Whores get all the breaks

(Reposted from my old blog. New blogs coming soon!)

I'm not finding a lot of time to grieve Whiskerbelle.

Tonight, we begin auditioning new girls. So I'm steeling myself for the parade o' pantyhose I've got ahead of me.

Speaking of which, I was in a hurry getting dressed today and put on the wrong stockings.

I spent the whole morning thinking I was wearing a regular pair of black hose, but Sook just pointed out to me that I have glittery seams running up the backs of my legs.

No wonder everybody's staring at me like I'm the Office Temp Whore.

And let's face it, that title's been taken. (No, not by Suki.)

There's this girl Bianca, she just started a few weeks ago. But she's already been under so many desks she's earned the nickname Head Secretary.

And surprise surprise, guess which temp just became a perm?

That's one way to do it, I suppose.

I've been here six times longer and worked ten times as hard, but just because I don't give...

I know what you're thinking. But Bobby in Human Resources doesn't count.

First of all, he was middle management.

And second of all, I felt bad for him. His wife had just died.

At least that's what he TOLD me. That cheesedick ass rat.

Trust me, girls. Nothing good ever comes of pity head. (Suki told me that should be my epitaph. One of many reasons I'm not letting her plan my funeral.)

Anyway, back to the whole audition thing. I'm not entirely sure I'm happy about expanding the site to include a bunch of new girls. And I know Suki hates the idea.

But Suki's a big diva. She wants a lot of face time.

Hey, she's got a lot of face.

Sometimes I just want to punch it in.

You guys don't know what it's like to have a best friend so gorgeous and so full of life that she makes you go invisible in a crowd.

Suki's my sidekick. I know that. She knows that. But the rest of the world sees it the other way around.

It's really hard sometimes. Sook does her best to be a good Wing Man whenever we go out, but all the good guys glom onto her and I'm left with nothing but dregs.

Suki says I actively seek out the dregs, but I don't think that's true. I pick out perfectly great guys. They just all turn out to be assholes and losers.

I hope these girls work out tonight. And the money really starts pouring in. If I could earn enough to bump my way into a better social class, I bet I'd meet a better class of guy.

Or at least, you know, RICH losers and assholes...

Love you! See you all soon!